Conjecturing on Saturn...

Zodiac Secret No. 4

Avoid the Shadows of Saturn

A shadow is created when an object stands between you and the light. Another person can stand as a shadow in your life, block out your spirit, and prevent you from getting what you want. Here's how you can recognize such a person.

Once you print out the chart, look for the position of his Saturn. If his Saturn is found in the sign of Scorpio, you have a problem. This will not be a zodiac love match.
Why?
Remember, that just for the sake of this exercise, we decided that you had your Sun in Scorpio. This man's Saturn is in the same sign as your Sun. This is the problem. You will feel like this man is a shadow hanging over your spirit. You will always feel dark and heavy around him. This would be quite depressing. Why?
Because Saturn is a restrictive and inhibiting force. It represents the basic fear in all of us -- what we don't want to look at --- what we avoid and suppress. This is because Saturn is ofen called a planet of karma because it represents fears that we need to confront and eventually resolve in understanding.
The light of your Sun in Scorpio, your ego and individual spirit, shines upon what the Saturn man does not want to look at. Therefore, he will try to suppress and criticize you . He does not want you to do what you like to do. You like expressing your deep emotional intensity and sexuality with your lover and he is afraid of real intimacy. He has a need to control you and suppress your need for intense emotional connections with others because of his deep fear of exposure, which is very necessary for true intimacy.
In short, you will not be able to be free with him. You cannot be who you are with him. He will not be able to share in this need of yours. In fact, he will criticize you for it because it arouses his own fear.
The lesson that you must learn from this secret is:
"Make sure his Saturn is not in the same sign as your Sun and that your Saturn is not in the same sign as his Sun."

http://www.skysage.com/zodiacsecrets.html

Oddly enough, the "heaviness" described above perfectly explains how I felt about most of the major relationships I've had.  Most recently, I met someone I became suddenly very attached too and immediately had this rush of dread which I couldn't explain in any other way than simply I'd felt it before and I could lay out the progression of my entire future relationship with this person after having spent 3 days with him.

I decided to see how many of those relationships shadowed my Scorpio Sun with an opposing Scorpio Saturn. The results were very interesting...

Charts of the 3 most significant others/important/influential relationships I've had in my 28.5 years. Note the Saturn placements:

Birth summary for Lexi :

Planet	Deg	Sign	Min
Sun	19º	Scorpio	53'
Moon	26º	Taurus	01'
Mercury	4º	Scorpio	08'
Venus	6º	Capricorn	58'
Mars	12º	Virgo	41'
Jupiter	27º	Libra	01'
Saturn	17º	Libra	15'
Uranus	29º	Scorpio	45'
Neptune	23º	Sagittarius	21'
Pluto	25º	Libra	17'
Ascendant	6º	Libra	30'
Midheaven	7º	Cancer	09'

This is my INT/FJ who has had me torn up for 6 months now. Like many past others, we have a cyclical relationship where I can't imagine finding someone I could love anymore (thus I am blinded to all others), he "NEEDS" me as a friend (i.e. needs me on a string) and guilt trips and criticizes me for things I know to be true for myself. Like all good Libras, he thinks things to be "objectively true" or false while I KNOW that there is nothing "objectively true" in the world. Best quote - "Prom Night is an objectively bad movie." If we agree, the objective truths are fine. If we disagree, such as in the case of emotions and relationships, it's very not fine. Check out his Saturn placement! And then, if you dare, check out my Saturn placement again.

Birth summary for Brian:

Planet	Deg	Sign	Min
Sun	20º	Libra	55'
Moon	2º	Aquarius	04'
Mercury	9º	Libra	48'
Venus	6º	Virgo	20'
Mars	9º	Virgo	10'
Jupiter	9º	Sagittarius	04'
Saturn	5º	Scorpio	17'
Uranus	6º	Sagittarius	37'
Neptune	26º	Sagittarius	50'
Pluto	29º	Libra	08'
Ascendant	14º	Aquarius	57'
Midheaven	2º	Sagittarius	51'

Rather than describing my sporadic multi-year involvement with this one, who I loved possibly harder than I've loved anyone in my life but who was the most distant of all the important ones, and again who would not allow me the title of "girlfriend." Ever. I will just copy/paste an email to me from said lover for the nebula to devour:


< CHRIST, people have been breaking my balls lately. Here's the plan:  I
was writing this huge letter regarding myself and this alleged immaturity
that everyone sees, but instead I'm going to request that you CUT OUT THE
EMO QUEERSHIT and SHOVE IT UP YER ASS!

Okay, well, I guess I am selfish.  I at least know I'm self-centered, but I
don't trust anyone who isn't at least a little self-centered.  As for this
whole distance thing you needed back in the day, yeah I can see that as
immature and selfish.  However, you must understand I'm not used to being
the object of someone's affection-- EVER.  I'm ugly and awkward, so it was a
new experience, you must forgive me if I didn't handle it delicately.  At
the time I was amazed by your friendship and it was really helping me
through  bad times and bla bla bla.  You know, I woke up this morning and my
fucking eye was killing me.  It just hurts, like it's been scratched, and
nothing helps.  So I'm fucking pissed off and annoyed right now, I'm going
to get off here and go smoke, call it immature but I'm leaving this email
mostly unanswered because I can only type with one hand and I feel horrible.
TO sum things up, I don't care if I'm immature or not.  Ne ne ne ne.

-Jeff
 >>

Birth summary for Jeff :
Planet     Deg     Sign     Min
Sun       21º       Capricorn       57'
Mercury  0º       Capricorn       35'
Venus       8º       Pisces       41'
Mars       13º       Pisces       41'  
Jupiter       24º       Capricorn       05'
Saturn       25º       Scorpio       44'
Uranus       15º       Sagittarius       59'
Neptune  1º       Capricorn       54'
Pluto       4º       Scorpio       34'

This was my longest boyfriend of 4-ish years full of interims where I unsuccessfully severed the relationship only to have him pull the "friend" guilt trip on me, a guise to keep me under his jealous watch, but more importantly to keep me from finding someone that could actually make me happy. The biggest, cruelest critic of my personality, life choices, aesthetics, sense of humor and every other facet of my being that defines me as an individual. Note, in this case, my Saturn placement and the fact that its the same as his. But additionally his own Saturn placement shadows him from seeing his Sun in the same time. He is a very self-defeatist person. He tends to take it out on others, but he quite often takes it out on himself too. Let me follow up that between this subtly abusive relationship of 4 years and the physically abusive whirlwind relationship that suddenly followed (even drove the last wedge into whatever thing we were trying to salvage between us after 4 years) it took me 4 years to feel like "myself" again, and it took 8 years apart to feel like the relationship was not still impeding my abilities to move forward with my life.

Birth summary for Greg :

Planet	Deg	Sign	Min
Sun	23º	Libra	00'
Moon	11º	Capricorn	45'
Mercury	17º	Scorpio	18'
Venus	13º	Virgo	05'
Mars	2º	Sagittarius	50'
Jupiter	27º	Virgo	45'
Saturn	3º	Libra	02'
Uranus	23º	Scorpio	54'
Neptune	20º	Sagittarius	27'
Pluto	21º	Libra	45'
Ascendant	0º	Leo	28'
Midheaven	16º	Aries	15'

And just for fun, charts from some more notable blasts from my past:



This one was married and yes, it got ugly. And yes, I tried to avoid it before it happened and yes, I was ashamed the whole time. And yes, he lied to me among others. A lot. And yes it was A) virtually impossible to avoid because we worked together - every day, and often alone and B) virtually impossible because he was an Aries and didn't listen to a practical thing I said. I had to quit my job to end the unhealthy cycle here.

Birth summary for Jeromy :

Planet	Deg	Sign	Min
Sun	2º	Aries	04'
Moon	22º	Pisces	33'
Mercury	4º	Pisces	19'
Venus	16º	Aquarius	17'
Mars	13º	Gemini	24'
Jupiter	3º	Pisces	22'
Saturn	28º	Gemini	17'
Uranus	26º	Libra	44'
Neptune	9º	Sagittarius	35'
Pluto	5º	Libra	34'
Ascendant	21º	Libra	38'
Midheaven	27º	Cancer	02'

Let's observe one that seemed pretty mutually stimulating emotionally and intellectually. Physically not too bad either. Practically, he had a kid and never moved out of his mom's house. Complacent and lazy, there was little I could do light a fire under this one. This was a case of me doing the same thing to him that was done to me by others - I wouldn't call him my boyfriend but we had a relationship. Mainly this was because he tried to date me and another girl at the onset of both of those relationships, both girls were hurt by this and though I forgave the injury eventually, I never trusted him and I was unwilling to commit to someone with so little ambition who had already made such a dramatic mark in the first week of to title or not to title... basically I was waiting for a justification and felt I deserved better anyway.

Birth Chart for Noah:

Planet	Deg	Sign	Min
Sun	22º	Cancer	48'
Moon	6º	Libra	45'
Mercury	29º	Cancer	59'
Venus	3º	Virgo	33'
Mars	11º	Cancer	06'
Jupiter	1º	Sagittarius	21'
Saturn	27º	Libra	54'
Uranus	5º	Sagittarius	26'
Neptune	27º	Sagittarius	11'
Pluto	26º	Libra	44'
Ascendant	24º	Scorpio	34'
Midheaven	6º	Virgo	06'

This is the chart of the first actual "boyfriend" I had since Greg. That is to say, he was proud to introduce me to people as his "girlfriend," he possessed me, and made it clear to me and to others that we were together. However, we had little in common and note he is another self-defeater. Also, he is the kind who tries to bring down those he sees who are successful, and if he can't, he resents or dislikes them for their success. Note again the Saturn and Sun placement.

Birth summary for Nathaniel :

Planet	Deg	Sign	Min
Sun	10º	Virgo	17'
Moon	15º	Virgo	33'
Mercury	22º	Leo	24'
Venus	26º	Libra	16'
Mars	18º	Libra	56'
Jupiter	29º	Cancer	34'
Saturn	4º	Virgo	48'
Uranus	13º	Scorpio	08'
Neptune	15º	Sagittarius	33'
Pluto	15º	Libra	13'
Ascendant	24º	Taurus	45'
Midheaven	4º	Aquarius	22'

This one again, good friend dynamic, plenty to talk about, philosophical minds compatible. Practical issues, like oh having a job, not wasting money borrowed from others on drugs, not living with his parents, and self-reliance in any capacity or other such things I value, not so hot. Musically inclined and a gentle, kind soul however. Again, note the Saturn placement.

Birth summary for Matt :

Planet	Deg	Sign	Min
Sun	5º	Aquarius	39'
Moon	27º	Pisces	56'
Mercury	19º	Capricorn	43'
Venus	22º	Pisces	38'
Mars	23º	Pisces	55'
Jupiter	27º	Capricorn	14'
Saturn	26º	Scorpio	44'
Uranus	16º	Sagittarius	39'
Neptune	2º	Capricorn	22'
Pluto	4º	Scorpio	43'
Ascendant	12º	Aries	00'
Midheaven	6º	Capricorn	48'